Trinity Baptist Church

The Book of Mark

The Truth About Divorce, Part 2

Mark 10:1-12

 

We are looking at the opening twelve verses of the  tenth chapter of Mark, which we began last week on the subject of divorce.  It is the third in a series of lessons the Lord is sharing with His disciples in preparation for them assuming the earthly ministry. 

 

Let me read the text so you have it in mind.

 

Mark 10:1-12

 

If you are  familiar with the Old Testament teaching of Malachi, then you will remember that God says flat out, “I hate divorce”.  And for anyone who has ever been impacted by it, it’s easy to understand why.  The pain and stigma, particularly in the church, is unlike any other problem that Christians face. 

 

In particular, divorce has a way of damaging the picture that God intends to portray of His own love for His people through marriage.  So for that reason and a number of others, God hates divorce.

 

In spite of the fact that God hates divorce, 400 years after Malachi, the Lord arrives and conducts His ministry and teaching in a world that has developed a very high tolerance of Divorce.  That was especially true of Judaism, in spite of what the Old Testament said.

 

 

In fact, they had developed a system of divorce in which a man could divorce his wife for absolutely anything.  All he had to do was do the paper work, hand her a document and send her away. And the Lord, as well as his forerunner, John the Baptist have taking a hard-line stance on divorce. 

 

And in verse 2, his enemies try to capitalize on that stance, hoping to discredit His ministry and see Him lose popularity with the people.  And the Lord responds and addresses this issue because He wants His apostles and His disciples and all of us to know the right teaching about divorce.

 

Last week, we saw the confrontation in verse 2. Then, beginning in verse 3, He offers a clarification based on Scripture.  God made one man and one woman and put them together in an indivisible relationship.  That was God’s plan. 

 

And because of the entrance of sin into the world, there was a conflict created between man and woman, and in particular husbands and wives that has to do with the curse God placed on them both.   

Adam was cursed to labor by the sweat of his brow and earn his bread. And the woman was by having to suffer pain in child bearing and living in rebeliion against the headship of man. 

 

To put it in modern terms, it is the conflict between women’s liberation and male chauvinism.  And that is what brings trouble into a marriage.  A sinful woman with strong will wants her way and she is living with an equally sinful man with a strong will who wants to dominate her.

 

 

So we’ve seen the confrontation and the clarification.

But in the clarification, Jesus brings up the subject of what Moses had to say about divorce, and asks in particular about

 

 

This is a very important question for Him to ask because He knows Moses did speak about divorce. And, in fact, Moses actually gave a command with regard to divorce. So our Lord asks the experts, the Pharisees, about their understanding of Old Testament Law.

 

Now what Jesus is aksing about is found in Deuteronomy 24

 

Verses 1-4

 

So here we have what the Spirit of God inspired Moses to write.

 

So the argument of the Pharisees was, according to Moses, a man could divorce his wife because of some indecency.  And they concluded and “indecency” was anything you wanted it to be. As I mentioned last week, a divorcable offense could be going around with loose hair, spinning in the streets so that other men see your ankles, or talking to men, or being unkind to your mother-in-law, or speaking to your husband so loud that the neighbors hear, or anything else. And you can give her a piece of paper and send her away.

 

But I want you to look back at that passage for a minute. Do you see a command to do that in verses 1 and 2? I don’t see a command in those verses.

In verse 1, Moses is describing a hypothetical situation.  A man gets married, and something happens to cause him to want a divorce.  So he writes her a certificate of divorce, puts it in her hand,  and sends her out the door.  She leaves and goes and gets married to someone else.

 

There is no command in that scenario.  It’s simply describing the situation.  A man gets married, doesn’t like her, divorces her, she goes and marries somebody else. That’s all it says.

 

Then verse adds some other possibilities.  The second husband doesn’t like her either and he repeats the process, or he dies, leaving her a widow.  Moses is simply broadening the possibilities, but we still have no command. 

 

That comes in verse 4

 

The command is the original husband can’t take her back once they’ve been divorced.  And the reason for that command was to keep a man from saying, “I think I’d like to try another wife for a few months, and if I don’t like her, I’ll take you back.” You can’t do that. Once you divorce your wife, she marries somebody else, there’s no swapping back.

 

The focus is really on the intended longevity of marriage.  And to the man, Moses says, “Before you say goodbye to your wife, you better think long and hard about that.  Because if you divorce her, and she remarries, that marriage will be a long-term commitment and you can’t take her back.   So you better think a long time about giving away the love of your life and the mother of your children.

You better think a long time about what you’re doing because once she connects to another person, you can never have her back”

 

That’s the only command here. It’s not a command to divorce. It’s a command not to remarry a woman that you have divorced who has then been married to someone else.  It doesn’t give any grounds for divorce at all.

 

Well the disciples must have been blown away by this teaching.  After all, as Jews they have been living under the instruction of the Pharisees and their liberal views regarding divorce.  So they want some clarification on this.

 

Verse 10

 

If you divorce your wife and marry somebody else, you commit adultery. If you divorce your husband and marry somebody else, you commit adultery. God hates divorce because it breaks the seventh commandment. It’s adultery.  So to be real clear:  God never permits remarriage to an illegitimately divorced person

 

So is there ever a situation in which divorce and remarriage can be legitimate.  Yes.  So let’s look at

 

 

If you know anything about the history of Israel, you know theirs was a hot and cold relationship with the Lord.  They could be on the highest mountain peak and descend to the lowest valleys in spiritual terms.  Their primary mistake was intermarrying with pagans.

In Deuteronomy 7, just before entering Canaan, God specifically said, “Don’t intermarry with the pagans.”

 

But that’s exactly what happened and the story is told in the tenth chapter of Ezra.

 

Ezra 10:1

 

So why is everybody crying? 

 

Verses 2-4

 

Can you imagine that? We have this mass divorce that occurs because divorce is actual a lesser evil than idolatry. 

 

Verses 17-19

 

Than all the way down to verse 44, it lists all their names!

 

Verse 44

 

So what was the problem?  They had disobeyed the Word of God and it was disastrous for the nation of Israel.  This is disastrous for tribal integrity, for the messianic line, for the future promises to Israel. This is potentially the end of the people of God. Israel is immoral. Israel is adulteress, idolatrous.

 

And God was patient with their idolatry for 700 years. But I want you to see what God said in

 

Jeremiah 3:6-8

 

To the Northern Kingdom, God finally God says, “I divorce you.”

And the Assyrians came, plundered the northern kingdom and took away the ten tribes and they were lost to history. There were members of each of those ten tribes in the southern kingdom, so the twelve tribes have continued. But those in the north were devastated and never returned. 

 

What was their sin?  They committed continual, spiritual with idols and were unfaithful to God.  And God divorced them. 

 

I find it interesting that under Mosaic Law, adultery called for the death penalty.  Remember the woman brught to Jesus who was caught in adultery.  They were seeking to stone here.  The law said the adulterer must die. 

 

That’s exactly what happened with the Northern Kingdom.  God divorced her for her adultery and she died at the hands of the Assyrians. 

 

Now here’s how I interpret that.  The law of capital punishment for adultery is no longer in force.  Therefore under the circumstances of adultery, divorce is an option. 

 

In fact, I think it safe to say the only Biblical grounds for divorce is adultery. And even God divorced His wife for adultery.

 

Now Mark 10 doesn’t say anything about adultery as grounds for divorce.  He only deals with the remarriage issue.  But Matthew, in his parallel account does talk about it.  So let’s take a look at the exception from his viewpoint. 

 

 

Matthew 19:9

 

So, very clear and to the point, in the case of sexual sin, divorce and remarriage are not adultery.   That’s the exception.

 

By the way, what the Lord syas here is the same thing He said in the Seromn on the Mount in Mattew 5, verse 32. 

 

According to Jesus and consistent with the Old Testament law, the only grounds for divorce and remarriage is sexual sin. 

 

However, we must always keep in mind that God hates divorce.  Divorce is not God’s will and adultery doesn’t have to be the end of a marriage.

 

How long did God wait before divorcing Israel?  Seven-hundred years. Remember the story of Hosea and Gomer?  God tells Hosea to get married.  He marries a girl named Gomer, which I think is always a bad idea! 

 

But anyway, he marries this girl called Gomer. She turns out to give him some children. Then she becomes a prostitute, sells her body and she’s gone. And God says, “Go find her. Buy her back, pay the price and redeem her, take her back.”

 

He goes into the marketplace where she’s being sold on the block and he treats her like a virgin bride. Takes her back. And God says that’s the picture of My relationship to Ephraim, divorced and one day in the future bought back.

 

So there’s a pattern there for us as well.  An act of sexual sin doesn’t necessarily mean the end. There’s a place for restoration. There’s a place for forgiveness. And when it happens it is a magnificent testimony to the grace and mercy and forgiveness of God. 

 

After all, is that not a part of God’s original design of marriage?  Are we not to put on display the love and grace and tenderness of God through our marriages? 

 

Proverbs 19:14 says “A man who finds a good wife, finds a good thing. A wife is a gift from the Lord. ” 

 

A wife is the best gift God can ever give a man, a husband is the best gift that God could ever give a woman. It’s the best thing in life. It’s the greatest joy and fulfillment in life!  I love being married!  I tell Lisa that quite often! 

 

I love my wife more now than I’ve ever loved her. She has not been married to a perfect man and I’ve not been married to a perfect woman.  But God brought us together for life and we are committed to pursuing His will through our marriage. 

 

After all, what God has joined together, let no man separate!

 

Let’s pray.